Bringing the girls into the world…

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I want to start this off by saying, the girls birth was not magical. I wouldn’t even say seeing them for the first time was (especially since that was at 2am, on drugs, while Jay was in the NICU facetiming me). But I’m getting ahead of myself. Now that we are out of the woods, and all of this feels like a distant memory, I thought I would share our birth story…

We found out we were having twins at my first doctor’s appointment. I was 8 weeks along and there they were, two little black dots. I had no idea what the nurse was showing me, and was in shock for probably a full 2 weeks after. If you google anything about early twin pregnancy (don’t!) it basically says you will be lucky if they make it and one will probably disappear, it’s terrifying. But we made it! I wasn’t sick, I was tired, but otherwise feeling really great. There were some weird pregnancy things going on, but nothing alarming or really that odd.

Since there were two, we had to go into Boston (an hour with traffic) every week for an ultrasound and appointment with the high risk office. This was intense, and each week brought with it a new worry. Everly (Baby 1 at the time) was smaller, significantly. But each week they grew, and even if it was only a little, everyone was growing! Then at week 32, my blood pressure started creeping up, slowly but surely. The doctor sent me home to do a 24 hour urine test starting Tuesday morning.

So here I am, collecting all this pee (gross sorry!), and starting to feel, just, off. When we first found out about there being two, the biggest worry I had was how could my body do it? I couldn’t imagine sustaining one baby let alone two in my body. And at 33 weeks pregnant, HUGE (everything was huge, my legs, ankles, face…everything), I finally was feeling that my body couldn’t do this much longer.

Right, so it is now Wednesday morning, and it is my last collection of the 24 hours around 6am. I go downstairs, do my thing, and come back up to get in bed for a little bit. I sit down in bed and Bam(!), I think my bladder has finally had it with the pressure, but no, after about 10 seconds I realize it’s my water breaking. So of course I scream “JAY!”. I call the doctor, email my boss, call my parents, and we are off to the hospital to see what is going on.

When we get to the hospital, I got checked in and immediately my blood pressure was being monitored…and it was high, and going up. At this point all the doctors (and their teams of students, so many people constantly in my room) weren’t sure if I was even going to deliver that day, and with the girls being only 33 weeks they wanted to keep them in as long as possible. After a move upstairs to L&D, and a quick blood test, they were positive, the babies were coming that day.

I started having contractions (which were horrible, of course) and then at 3:00pm we were on our way to have the c-section. The c-section was probably the easiest part of all of this. You can’t feel a thing, except some bizarre tugging, plus there are doctors all over telling you everything is going great. And then, 3:26 there comes Baby 1, and 3:27 Baby 2. Everyone kept asking us their names and we had no idea still (at this point they were potentially Penelope and Beatrix. for real.).IMG_6536

The girls each had their own team of pediatricians and nurses in the delivery room, and I only saw them for less than 1 second before they were rushed off and down to the NICU. In the meantime, I am getting put back together while trying to figure out names with Jay. I’m so drugged up at this point I have no idea how bad the incisions were about to feel in a few hours.

When we get back to the L&D room, I was put on magnesium to make sure I didn’t have a stroke. My BP was 190/110, and all the doctors were calm but concerned. Anyone who has ever been on magnesium knows what this is like, but it is the absolute worst. It gets worse the longer you are on it, and feels like the most horrible hangover ever. You can’t see straight or focus, your head feels like a million pounds, and nothing is exactly clear that is going on around you. On top of all this there are teams of doctors coming in and out, my bp being constantly monitored, the pain medication they gave me didn’t work (thank god for the nurse who finally got the doctor to give me something different), and worst of all, worse than any pain or fear of what was going on with my body was, I couldn’t see the girls.

Finally sometime in the middle of the night Jay was able to go down to the NICU and facetime me so I could see our, still nameless, babies (the names were finally decided sometime in the middle of the night). And then around 3am, I was brought down to the NICU to see my little babies (only 3lbs) in containers where I could only touch there little hands for a second through a hole.

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The days that followed were equally as intense. My BP wasn’t dropping so I was put on round the clock medications and IVs. I was draining all the fluid from my body (10 liters in 12 hours), I had to pump every 3 hours to send whatever I could get down to the NICU for the girls, and I couldn’t sit/stand/walk for days.

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We did manage to get down to the NICU each day to see the girls, which had its own difficulties. I wanted to be with them so badly, to have them in my room, to breastfeed them like everyone else gets to with their newborns, but none of that was going to be our experience.

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After my hospital stay it wasn’t much easier at home. I had to have visiting nurse service come every day to take my BP. I was re-admitted to the hospital after being home for 4 days for my eclampsia on the same day the girls were scheduled to be transferred to a hospital closer to our new house (yea, we moved 3 weeks before this!). But without fail, Jay and I got up and drove 45 minutes to the NICU to see those girls each and every day.

At this point I was still on a ton of medication…pain meds, 3 blood pressure meds, and meds to drain the fluid. And of course, waking up every 3 hours still to pump. Each day I would have a mini (yea, not mini, massive) breakdown about not having the girls home. Not having them with us was so difficult and went against every single instinct my body was telling me.

The NICU though, was amazing. The care and compassion of the nurses there is an experience that can’t be matched. They walked us through everything, took the best care of our girls, gave us reports every day on the phone before we came in, and constantly made us feel we were doing the best job we could. When the girls were first brought down to the NICU we were told they most likely would be there until their true due date (8/22) which would be almost 2 months later….

But those babie are troopers! After a little over 3 weeks, we had Vanessa home, and a few days later we had Everly (she had to get to 4lbs). Not to say everything was a walk in the park, but having them home with us was so exciting I didn’t mind any of it. The girls were on a 3 hour schedule and since they were so small that meant waking them in the middle of the night (3,6,9,12,3,6,9,12 – all day everyday) to eat.

Meanwhile, my bp was still pretty crazy. I had doctors’ appointments constantly to check it and was on medication until just a few weeks ago! I still have to home monitor, but it is nothing like it was in the beginning, and neither are those babies! When the girls came home, all skin and bones, it was hard to imagine them getting bigger or filling out…and now, 6 months later, we have two growing, thriving, giggly, rolling, happy babies, who are the greatest people I’ve ever met.

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We have pictures of them from the NICU on the fridge that both Jay and I look at in disbelief of who they were when they came into this world, and the circumstances we all found ourselves in. I think the thing I feel most looking at those pictures is thankful. Thankful for Jay who was there for me in ways I couldn’t imagine needing him, thankful for the doctors who took care of not only my girls but me, thankful for our family who was there for both of us, and mostly thankful to see those little faces every day home, healthy, and loved.

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Xo – J

6 months

Well, as you can imagine life has been a bit crazy here, doesn’t allow for to much blogging (or anything) time!  In a few short days our girls are going to be 6 months old, and I’m truly not sure how that happened.  Everyone says time flies, but it really has…not to say there weren’t some long days…such long days (like when our ac broke and we were sleeping on our living room floor right after coming home from the hospital, healing from my surgery, all crazed up on blood pressure meds, and driving an hour+ each way everyday to see our girls for 3 weeks…but those are all their own separate stories).

V & E grow every single day, they are rolling, laughing, grabbing, eating, and constantly wanting to play and snuggle.  I don’t think anything could have prepared me for the amount of insane love I could have for not one, but two people.  These past 6 months have been the most insane, complicated, tiring, and fantastic of my life. So here are some of my favorites from these past few months, I can’t wait to see what is coming next. 

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xo-J

SanFran

imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageA few weeks ago we went out in SF for our friends’ wedding, which was so exciting because, of course, we got to see all our friends and they were getting married, but especially exciting for me since I hadn’t ever been to California! We had a great trip exploring with our friends from Brooklyn (and I got to see my friend from home too!).  Though it’s definitely hard to be the only one not allowed to have a drink! We took the red eye back after a day of being hotel-less wandering the city, and I’m pretty sure that’s the last time we ever do that. We were exhausted! Always so much fun to see a new city.

Honeymoon & Life Since June…

Since the wedding in June we have been non-stop.  We’ve been to SC, NH, NJ, NYC (multiple times), FL (Jay), and now HI.  We became Aunt and Uncle (and God parents!) to the cutest little man ever, visited friends all over, went to a nascar race (what?!), went on a minimoon in Charleston, and a million other things are missing from this list.  It has been a great couple months since the wedding and I can’t wait for the holidays to come!

We just got back from our (delayed) Honeymoon in Hawaii!  We were able to spend two weeks away from the cold and had the most amazing time.  We rode horses, snorkeled with turtles and in a crater, hiked, relaxed on beautiful beaches, went to two islands, stayed at 3 perfect resorts, enjoyed super delicious (and expensive, ay!) meals, rented a jeep and did the road to hana, and (again) a million things that are missing from that list…it was all so much fun.

I have a bunch of pictures to go through still, but was able to go through all the video and make a short one of the trip.  Since we are both all time confused I was up late last night and got it done!  I hope you enjoy watching, cause we sure enjoyed everything we did in it!

xo- J (& prob Jay too)

 

Wedding Video

Our amazing (really amazing) videographer got our wedding short to us this week and it is, well, amazing!  There are actually two versions, both are wonderful.  If you are having a wedding in CT make sure to call Matt!  Not only was Matt (and Max) fun to work with on the wedding day, his time with us both before and after the wedding have been an absolute pleasure, I can’t say enough…really.

Anyway, here they are!  The first a bit more fast paced (and definitely a lot more us), and the second a bit more lovey!  Matt did so much work on both of these, when he only had to do one, and I couldn’t be more thankful that we get to relive the day again and again!

xo, j

J & J

Here are some of my favorite shots of Jay and I from our wedding day.  Our photographer was seriously awesome, I would recommend her to anyone and can’t stop raving about how beautiful these photos came out.

f (300)f (16)f (1) f (8)  Fl (34)f (38) f (164)f (57) r (482)f (60)  f (68)f (71) f (276) f (290) f (129)f (315) f (275)f (135)f (316) IMG_5900Fl (9)  IMG_5925 IMG_6240 IMG_7452 jewelphotof (60)

I can’t say it enough, thank you to everyone who made our day so wonderful.  We love you all so much!

xo – j

The first of many Wedding Photo posts

I can’t believe it has been over 3 weeks since the big day.  We truly had the most perfect time with all our friends and family.  Thank you all so much for everything you did for both of us.  We had so much support from everyone we have ever loved, and were so excited (and flattered) to see everyone that traveled to be there.

We have thousands of photos to go through but I wanted to pick out some detail shots to share today.  Everyone says that your wedding day is going to go by fast, and honestly, it went by even faster than we were warned.  I wish we could do it over and over again.     I did a lot of DIY for the wedding and since as the bride I was running around kissing and hugging and talking and dancing,  I missed seeing a lot of the things I had made all set up. The best part is we get to see photos now of everything we missed!

Again, thank you to all our friends and family.  We love you all so so much and we are thrilled to finally be Mr. & Mrs.

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And for good measure here is one of us…

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I apologize in advance for all of the future wedding posts to come!  There are just too many beautiful photos not to share!

xo – J (& Jay too)

One year

One year ago today we got approved for our house in the afternoon and engaged in the evening.  It was a big day, huge day actually!  Not only did we finally find the place we wanted to live and on the path to purchasing it, but we were also getting married! Now, two months from yesterday, we will be at our wedding, it’s wild.

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A lot has changed in the past year, but I wouldn’t change it.  I still can’t believe the wedding is only 2 months away…ah so much to do!

xo – J

Lately…

Pictures from the past week(ish)…

(A little wedding preview below, our cake toppers came and we got our wedding bands!)

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(and of course celebrated getting the bands)

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(i’ve been doing gluten free this week, so i made sure to have my fill before i started! cake from my cousin and i made croissants this weekend)

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(zucchini pasta with gfree chicken pesto meatballs…mmm.  jay refused to eat it since it wasn’t real pasta…ay! got the wonderful idea/recipe from my love ashley)

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(a lazy snuggle with my main man)

xo-j